November 13, 2008

Numero Uno

My kid likes to win. We have races to the car and back to the house. We have drinking water races. Bike races. Shower races. Sometimes, I learn that am the loser in a race, and I didn't even know I was competing.

"How could our child be so competitive?" my husband and I have asked each other. The kid does not participate in competitive sports, just swimming lessons and Cirque du Soleil-type circus class. My husband and I have scratched our heads for at least two years.

And then, there was Uno.

We began with open hands to learn the basics. We were having a blast, and then it turned. I started saying things like, "Let's stick it to Daddy."

As I'm certain you are aware, when you have one card left in your hand, you have to shout "Uno" before your fellow players catch it or suffer a penalty. Well, the kiddo forgot, and I shouted, "Uno," and pointed aggressively as if to say gotcha.

I made my child cry.

In that moment, I got it. The competitive thing comes from me, and possibly Dad. I will leave him to contemplate his own dark side.

We have talked a lot about being a "gracious winner or loser." When we win, can we thank the other team for being so on their game that the level of our game rose up to meet it? If we lost, can we be happy for the victor and know that we did our best?

We all need to experience the thrill of victory and agony of defeat and know how to move on to the next moment. Can we trust that we will get another chance to play and that it could be different?

Clearly, I need some more practice.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey Jody,
It was so cool to see you all when I was back. Erik will be back next week.
I "LOVE" your site....
Will catch up more soon.
Love to all,
Melanie